Nov. 5th, 2008

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Sean Tevis lost in Kansas by less than 250 votes.

I shed a tear for Kansas. Sadly, they only spiral further downwards.
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I palled around with Morgan Spurlock!
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Prop 8 should fail because of freedom from religion. It should fail because some people cling to superstition and completely outmoded tradition, and would prefer to swathe themselves in a stinging, sticky coating of fear of the unknown, and then cover themselves with a warm blanket of comforting delusion - and those people want to tell everyone what to do with their lives.

Watch this video, funded by religious groups:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zbpDe_QhS0

What does this video tell you?

- Only "traditional" marriage counts and is strong; anything else "harms society" (even though no harm has ever been witnessed)
- Gays and straights can be friends, but don't share "traditional" values (why, that's just impossible!)
- Only male homosexual couples exist (the scary and dreaded MAN + MAN)
- Allowing all people to marry ISN'T about "rights and equality"; I mean, come on, black people get their own separate fountain already!! It's not like we don't let those people drink water.
- States have the ability to pass laws requiring churches to perform same sex marriages, DESPITE THE FIRST AMENDMENT OF THE U.S. CONSTITUTION. (um, no, you morons)
- "Tolerance" doesn't ever have to mean compromising what YOU WANT! You don't ever have to do anything you don't want to do. (If you're straight and "traditional")
- "Respect" only means you have to be pretend nice! You don't really have to affirm or support people you "respect".

This message was brought to you by a cult that believes that there's a whole other testament of the bible that you don't know about, you silly "traditional" Christians! They also wear magic underwears and have many wives... which is actually okay and totally cool, because marriage is the union between a man and a women.

p.s. WON'T SOMEBODY THINK OF THE FUCKING CHILDREN ALREADY???
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It's easy to be a gracious loser when you want to keep your job as a senator (and McCain will do that until he leaves due to health reasons, because Arizona will never let him go - so why not be gracious now that you're tenured?).

It's easy to be gracious when it's a relief that you lost. I don't think McCain really wanted to win, honestly. I think he was so tired by the end of campaigning that he couldn't keep going even if he wanted to. I think that in his heart of hearts he knew that Sarah Palin was the wrong choice, just another in a long, LONG string of compromises he has made throughout the last decade of his career; compromises that transformed him from a maverick into an empty caricature of a maverick and a shell of a man: nothing more than a politically expedient vehicle for the forces of evil that want to seize this country and turn it into another fascist state.

Lastly, it's easy to sound gracious when you've been practicing your concession speech for a while, and you're a decades long-serving old boy from the Senate.

McCain betrayed this country and would have sold us all down the river - but worse than that, he betrayed himself and any ideals he once fought for. I could not be gladder to see him finished.

Thoughts on Sarah Palin? Only this: she's the most dangerous woman in America, and she could tear this country apart completely. Someone needs to find her sex tape and post it on the Internet already.

Do not be deceived by their grace, you kind people. And do not be shocked and surprised when they turn right around and transform back into pit bulls with lipstick the first chance they get to seize more power. Do not forget that fomented hate. Do not let ONE SPEECH make you disregard TWO YEARS of calling your precious newly elected president a MUSLIM TERRORIST (fist jabber, Osama, Barack Hussein, THAT ONE, baby mama, BOMB BOMB BOMB IRAN... how soon you people forget. One fucking concession speech).
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Morgan Spurlock (Super Size Me, 30 Days)
Jack McBrayer (30 Rock)
Scott Adsit (30 Rock)
David Zayas (Dexter)
John Hodgman (PC/Mac ads, Daily Show)
John Oliver (Daily Show)

And I'm sure there were others whom I did not recognize...

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